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August 17, 2013

Diary of a Big Pregnant Girl

Just days before my due date, I was chatting on the phone with a friend who was expressing her concern over "how big Kate Middleton still looked the day after she delivered her baby". As I shifted the subject to William and Kate's excellent carseat choice, I was actually thinking, "Are you kidding me?! I would love to look like that post partum!" You see, some women look like Kate Middleton during and after pregnancy, but some of us fall more into the "Jessica Simpson" pregnancy category. We carry alot of amniotic fluid. The summer heat swells us. We treat ourselves to carbs and sugars that we don't typically eat. You get the idea. We're big. We know it. We don't need to be reminded.

I do not consider myself a sensitive person, but I never cease to be amazed at people's comments and reactions regarding my now twice pregnant belly.

"Whoa, girl! Are you having twins?!" (from every third person who notices I am pregnant)

"Dang, girl!!"  (from the teenage boy at the Cookout drive-thru window)

"Oh my goodness!" - complete with *gasp* (from the teenage girl at the Cookout drive-thru window)

And my favorites..."You aren't diabetic?!" "Are you sure your blood pressure is okay?!" "How does your weight compare to last time?"
(What these people are really saying is "Geez, girl, you are huge!" They just don't want to come right out and say it - even though their bulging eyeballs and raised eyebrows tell all.)

I do not find my feelings hurt over these comments. In fact, hubby and I have had some great laughs - especially this time around the block. 

Speaking of which...meet our new little man!
He weighed in at 10 lbs. 4 oz. and measured 23 inches long! He is absolutely precious - He eats well and sleeps well, and we are loving his sweet cuddles.

It seemed like he was never going to arrive - I spent most of the month of July dilated to 4 centimeters and 60% effaced. I spent the final week of my pregnancy dilated to 5-6 centimeters and 70% effaced. I had multiple "false alarms". I tried [almost] ever trick in the book to naturally induce labor. During that final month, I grew impatient and then reminded myself of God's timing...oh, about 145,785 times. The morning that I went in to labor started out pretty laid back - I was even planning to take my toddler to his art class. However, things quickly escalated, and we barely made it to the hospital in time. I will not give you all the details here, but let's just say...I'm glad we didn't head to art class that morning. Mercy sakes, I would have completely missed out on that very, very last minute epidural! (Side note: Thank you, God, for epidurals - I truly mean that...with every fiber of my being.)

Thankfully, my recovery this time around has been completely different than after my first. After my first delivery (almost two years ago), my doctor sent me home with lots of pain meds and told me to expect night terrors, possible PTSD, etc. to follow. Praise the Lord I did not struggle with those things, but I did have a difficult time. My baby was perfect - doing everything newborns are supposed to do - but my healing was slow. Combine that with our living situation at the time (which was a transitional apartment), the then climate at my hubby's work, and the fact that all of our family lives out of town, and you get a m.e.s.s. which was me. It took me weeks and weeks and weeks to feel like myself again. Friends who had experienced similar feelings were extremely understanding and supportive - giving me the perfect mixture of positive encouragement and space. Other friends weren't quite so understanding - but that time taught me alot about the things I can do to encourage other new moms who may be struggling in some way.

This time around, things are better. I know myself better - I know what I need and don't need - I can honestly say that I am in better place all the way around. This delivery was nothing compared to last time, and my healing is going smoothly. Being in our house with the space to "do life" has made a tremendous difference when it comes to my mental health and [somewhat] psychotic need for organization. Being in our neighborhood - with space to roam outside and sidewalks to stroll - has been wonderful! Our neighbors and church family have brought meals and gifts, and we feel very blessed to have all of these people in our life. We have so appreciated the help of visiting grandparents, and I have been spoiled rotten by my sweet hubby.

We are loving life right now!

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