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November 1, 2014

Dear Grandparents

Dear Grandparents,

We know you love your grandchildren with all of your heart, but there's something we need to tell you. This year, when it comes time for you to do your Christmas shopping, we would like to make just a couple of suggestions regarding the toys....

...If it lights up, sings, makes animal noises, plays music, growls, sounds like a telephone or a doorbell, resembles the sound of truck or an airplane or a helicopter, roars like a dinosaur, flashes, barks, moos, squeaks, pops, dances, makes a crashing sound, can be turned on and off, can not be turned off, makes a sound when it moves, makes a sound for no reason, talks at 3 am, makes noise when the lights are turned on and off,  includes speakers, requires assembly, requires batteries, takes up more than a 12-inch area of the floor, requires seasonal storage, squirts water, requires refills, creates a mess, mentions anything about "500 pieces" or "small parts included", or breaks toes if encountered during the night, please include a gift receipt.

The Parents of Your Grandchildren

P.S. Are you trying to pay us back for something we did when we were little?

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